Michael was always the guy who was healthy. He never found a reason to go to the doctor. He would joke around that his part Polish genes made him “strong like bull”.
Then one day in July 2011 he was mysteriously bitten by a tick and got Lyme disease. After that first attack of Lyme disease, Michael never quite recovered and he got bit again by an infected tick and he got Lyme disease for the second time.
He is in the road to recovery, but his immune system seems to have taken a little beating making him susceptible to other ailments like strep throat, body aches, stomach issues, etc..
How do you cope when your spouse become ill? When we got married we recited the vows, “I promise to be true to you in good times and in bad, in sickness and in health. I will love you and honor you all the days of my life.”
I take my vows seriously, but when you are a stay at home Mom, and you have a sick spouse fear can sometimes get in the way. Here are some steps to get over being worried (you can also use it to prevent worrying during spousal illnesses):
1. Tell your spouse how you feel – At first I was going to tell Michael everything was going to be fine, but then I told him my true feelings of being scared. I felt better that I was able to “let the cat out of the bag” and he felt better that I was being completely honest.
2. Allow yourself to be a little mad – I wasn’t mad at Michael for getting sick, because that was uncontrollable. I am mad at those darn infected ticks! Okay, and maybe at Michael a little for getting sick!
3. Use humor to make yourself feel better – Since Michael’s illness is out of our hands we have just tried to laugh at anything to make ourselves feel better. Our kids are pretty goofy so they supply the much needed comic relief.
4. Count your blessings – We are happy that Michael is undergoing treatment and that the rest of the family is healthy.
5. Reassure each other and your children – Make sure to tell each other how much you love one another. Love conquers everything, especially fear of your spouse being sick. Reassure your children that everything will be fine as the little ones are usually very sensitive to changes in their environment.
6. Make sure you save up for a rainy day – This is a key ingredient for feeling happy and less worried about your spouse getting sick when you are a stay at home Mom. If you know there are funds for a rainy day then things will all be okay.
7. Pray to God – Prayer and faith in God has helped us through trying moments. There is a saying, “Faith or fear? If you have faith you won’t be scared.”
I hope you have a wonderful and healthy day!